Titbids, I Mean Tidbits
Shaken, Not Stirred
I have a new celebrity crush. Not sure yet if he will earn membership to the "The List"-you know the one. It's the list that modern day couples compile that basically gives you or your significant other a free pass, so to speak, if either one of you is ever fortunate enough to have a chance to "hook-up" with a celebrity of their choosing. So couples come up with these lists of the top 5 (or maybe in some more ravenous couples a top 10) celebrities that they would be able to do the nasty with and their significant other could not complain, divorce, or even withhold sex in an attempt to exact revenge for the infidelity. I think I kind of know who would be on my list, although I have never written it down. It had included two brunettes (one is bad and one is hip), a red head, a Latino, and a rock star. But I might have to add a new fella after watching the film Layer Cake last week. Daniel Craig is whom I referring to, the current 007. The disturbing thing of it is though, that I thought to myself during the movie, "hmmm. he's not bad for an older dude." You know how some women are attracted to the older distinguished gentleman sect. Not me usually, I like em young and ripe for the picking. I mean if I'm going to ogle I want ripples not wrinkle. So imagine my surprise when I looked up Mr. Craig's bio and noticed that he is only one year older than I am. Frankly, I'm a little worried about that.
Cyber Snoop
Speaking of looking things up on the interent, or more appropriately borderline stalking behavior, I was bored this week at work. And when you have the world (wide web ) at your fingertips, what's a girl to do? I engaged in some cyber-snooping this past week that enlightened me and reminded me that ex-boyfriends are better left at "ex" status despite what your traitorous memory does to convince you otherwise. My junior high boyfriend has wrap sheet a mile long, mostly involving driving infractions but not the speeding ticket kind. There might have been some drug charges, resisting arrest, and some other more unsavory actions. Then I find that my high school boyfriend has three restraining orders out on him. Which should come as not surprise to me at all. I guess I have made some wise choices after all.
A League of their Own
Youth sports are a wonderful opportunity for children to be exposed to the concepts of teamwork, sportsmanship and perseverence. It also gives grown ups the chance to engage in such behaviors as complaining, yelling, and the occassional fistfight. My daughter is playing in a softball league for a rural athletic association and has developed such positive skills over the past several weeks. Sadly, she has also been exposed to the negative side of youth sports. Since we only have two teams in our league we venture out to other rural leagues so the girls have a chance for more competition. As it turns out we have a pretty good team and are now tied for first place with another team from another, even more rural, athletic association. In our first meeting with them they beat us on their field. We got a rematch and I will avoid the long and gory details of the meeting. The bottom line is that the coaches agreed to a rule at the beginning of the game. When it came time to enforce the rule, our coach was put in the awkward position of being able to change to terms of the agreement (with the veiled "threat" that they had some rowdy folks on the sidelines). Needless to say our coach stuck by the agreement which allowed us to win the game.
Back in the day, when you lost a game you took it like a good sport by calling it a day and hoping for a better outcome next time. However, friends, we live in a new day and age where it's our god-given right to complain when something doesn't go our way and somewhere someone's making 5 cents on every complaint registered. So the some disgruntled parents and fans of this rival team called our athletic association the next day to complain. The truly ironic thing about the whole shebang is that our team was accused of the very thing that there team was guilty of- wasting time. You see the rule they wanted to switch midstream involved being able to start the next inning within the time limit of the game. They were down by one run and might have had a chance to come back. However, we were the home team so we still would have had another at bat. Because we didn't have enough time for both teams to bat and since the coaches agreed on this beforehand our coach took the win and turned down their "offer" to play another inning. And there is no doubt had the situation had been reversed their coach would have done the same thing. So, you would think that this would be the end of it and they would go home and try again next time. I mean it is not the World Series, just a small athletic league for 7 and 8 year old girls. But no, that would not be the end of it.
So we were accused of wasting time to ensure the win, because you know it wasn't their coach who slowly sashayed across the field in vain attempt to express her dissatisfaction with being told she couldn't coach from the field that wasted any time, you know. And it certainly wasn't their coach who had to question every call and every position of our team on the field. And when our youngest team member FINALLY got a hit and was so surprised she ran almost to their dugout carrying the bat with her, it wasn't their coach who argued she should be out because she ran out of the baseline and spent a great deal of time arguing his case (editorial note: She was not avoiding a tag and you do have some leeway with the first base line.But who am I to complain?) We were just so proud she finally got a hit, and their team insisted on taking away that small triumph from her because there are trophies at stake here, people! We have a rematch with them on Thursday, hopefully their fans won't show up with pillow cases filled with door knobs.
Potty Mouth
About a little over a month ago, the annual Merlefest was held in Wilkesboro, NC. If you don't know what that is, I'm so sorry for you. For those who are informed, you know that Merlefest is the premiere bluegrass festival on the East coast and hosts a weekend long musical festival with a cast of characters from the most seasoned and established to the new up and coming americana musicians. There has been a long standing tension in the bluegrass world between the traditionalists who like things just the way they are thank you very much and the new grassers who use the roots of bluegrass as a starting point for their own take on bluegrass. This rift was further evidenced in the reactions to situation that took place on one of the stages with one of the up and comers.
The debate centered around the use of some particular language by one of the performers during the normal stage banter. For those of you who have seen bluegrass musicians perform there is that aw shucks humor that sometimes is used. Also there is an unspoken rule at Merlefest that since it is family friendly that the language and humor be kept around acceptable family friendly themes. Well, one of the musicians happened to use a word that, and I will gasp asI type the keys, most certainly should not be heard by children and families. In describing that on their way to the festival while driving through Viriginia they saw a billboard that said Virginia-Seductive and Productive the "weird" cello player changed the word Virginia to the anatomically correct term for a woman's hoo haw. The horror of it all was that the stage where the band was performing was positioned next to the kiddie playground. As I'm sure that the kids in the middle of their running and screaming and swinging and climbing were instanly riveted when the vulgar stage banter came over the PA system and will now be scarred for life because they heard the world V-A-G-I-N-A. Not the f bomb or the other world for crap or the one that rhymes with glass. And because the internet has brought us such wonderful things as You Tube, Priceline, and ebay it has also brought us chat rooms and message boards which can quickly become a forum for anonymous tools and trolls. Oh and they came out in full force to eloquently and passionately called for that foul mouth cellist's head on a platter. Now there asking the festival organizers to ban the group from playing again. It is a brave new world out there folks!
I have a new celebrity crush. Not sure yet if he will earn membership to the "The List"-you know the one. It's the list that modern day couples compile that basically gives you or your significant other a free pass, so to speak, if either one of you is ever fortunate enough to have a chance to "hook-up" with a celebrity of their choosing. So couples come up with these lists of the top 5 (or maybe in some more ravenous couples a top 10) celebrities that they would be able to do the nasty with and their significant other could not complain, divorce, or even withhold sex in an attempt to exact revenge for the infidelity. I think I kind of know who would be on my list, although I have never written it down. It had included two brunettes (one is bad and one is hip), a red head, a Latino, and a rock star. But I might have to add a new fella after watching the film Layer Cake last week. Daniel Craig is whom I referring to, the current 007. The disturbing thing of it is though, that I thought to myself during the movie, "hmmm. he's not bad for an older dude." You know how some women are attracted to the older distinguished gentleman sect. Not me usually, I like em young and ripe for the picking. I mean if I'm going to ogle I want ripples not wrinkle. So imagine my surprise when I looked up Mr. Craig's bio and noticed that he is only one year older than I am. Frankly, I'm a little worried about that.
Cyber Snoop
Speaking of looking things up on the interent, or more appropriately borderline stalking behavior, I was bored this week at work. And when you have the world (wide web ) at your fingertips, what's a girl to do? I engaged in some cyber-snooping this past week that enlightened me and reminded me that ex-boyfriends are better left at "ex" status despite what your traitorous memory does to convince you otherwise. My junior high boyfriend has wrap sheet a mile long, mostly involving driving infractions but not the speeding ticket kind. There might have been some drug charges, resisting arrest, and some other more unsavory actions. Then I find that my high school boyfriend has three restraining orders out on him. Which should come as not surprise to me at all. I guess I have made some wise choices after all.
A League of their Own
Youth sports are a wonderful opportunity for children to be exposed to the concepts of teamwork, sportsmanship and perseverence. It also gives grown ups the chance to engage in such behaviors as complaining, yelling, and the occassional fistfight. My daughter is playing in a softball league for a rural athletic association and has developed such positive skills over the past several weeks. Sadly, she has also been exposed to the negative side of youth sports. Since we only have two teams in our league we venture out to other rural leagues so the girls have a chance for more competition. As it turns out we have a pretty good team and are now tied for first place with another team from another, even more rural, athletic association. In our first meeting with them they beat us on their field. We got a rematch and I will avoid the long and gory details of the meeting. The bottom line is that the coaches agreed to a rule at the beginning of the game. When it came time to enforce the rule, our coach was put in the awkward position of being able to change to terms of the agreement (with the veiled "threat" that they had some rowdy folks on the sidelines). Needless to say our coach stuck by the agreement which allowed us to win the game.
Back in the day, when you lost a game you took it like a good sport by calling it a day and hoping for a better outcome next time. However, friends, we live in a new day and age where it's our god-given right to complain when something doesn't go our way and somewhere someone's making 5 cents on every complaint registered. So the some disgruntled parents and fans of this rival team called our athletic association the next day to complain. The truly ironic thing about the whole shebang is that our team was accused of the very thing that there team was guilty of- wasting time. You see the rule they wanted to switch midstream involved being able to start the next inning within the time limit of the game. They were down by one run and might have had a chance to come back. However, we were the home team so we still would have had another at bat. Because we didn't have enough time for both teams to bat and since the coaches agreed on this beforehand our coach took the win and turned down their "offer" to play another inning. And there is no doubt had the situation had been reversed their coach would have done the same thing. So, you would think that this would be the end of it and they would go home and try again next time. I mean it is not the World Series, just a small athletic league for 7 and 8 year old girls. But no, that would not be the end of it.
So we were accused of wasting time to ensure the win, because you know it wasn't their coach who slowly sashayed across the field in vain attempt to express her dissatisfaction with being told she couldn't coach from the field that wasted any time, you know. And it certainly wasn't their coach who had to question every call and every position of our team on the field. And when our youngest team member FINALLY got a hit and was so surprised she ran almost to their dugout carrying the bat with her, it wasn't their coach who argued she should be out because she ran out of the baseline and spent a great deal of time arguing his case (editorial note: She was not avoiding a tag and you do have some leeway with the first base line.But who am I to complain?) We were just so proud she finally got a hit, and their team insisted on taking away that small triumph from her because there are trophies at stake here, people! We have a rematch with them on Thursday, hopefully their fans won't show up with pillow cases filled with door knobs.
Potty Mouth
About a little over a month ago, the annual Merlefest was held in Wilkesboro, NC. If you don't know what that is, I'm so sorry for you. For those who are informed, you know that Merlefest is the premiere bluegrass festival on the East coast and hosts a weekend long musical festival with a cast of characters from the most seasoned and established to the new up and coming americana musicians. There has been a long standing tension in the bluegrass world between the traditionalists who like things just the way they are thank you very much and the new grassers who use the roots of bluegrass as a starting point for their own take on bluegrass. This rift was further evidenced in the reactions to situation that took place on one of the stages with one of the up and comers.
The debate centered around the use of some particular language by one of the performers during the normal stage banter. For those of you who have seen bluegrass musicians perform there is that aw shucks humor that sometimes is used. Also there is an unspoken rule at Merlefest that since it is family friendly that the language and humor be kept around acceptable family friendly themes. Well, one of the musicians happened to use a word that, and I will gasp asI type the keys, most certainly should not be heard by children and families. In describing that on their way to the festival while driving through Viriginia they saw a billboard that said Virginia-Seductive and Productive the "weird" cello player changed the word Virginia to the anatomically correct term for a woman's hoo haw. The horror of it all was that the stage where the band was performing was positioned next to the kiddie playground. As I'm sure that the kids in the middle of their running and screaming and swinging and climbing were instanly riveted when the vulgar stage banter came over the PA system and will now be scarred for life because they heard the world V-A-G-I-N-A. Not the f bomb or the other world for crap or the one that rhymes with glass. And because the internet has brought us such wonderful things as You Tube, Priceline, and ebay it has also brought us chat rooms and message boards which can quickly become a forum for anonymous tools and trolls. Oh and they came out in full force to eloquently and passionately called for that foul mouth cellist's head on a platter. Now there asking the festival organizers to ban the group from playing again. It is a brave new world out there folks!
posted by amyd | 10:11 AM
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